Today I started the day off in a pretty bad funk. You know one of those "woe is me" days. I was tired of being home alone with the kiddo's. I was just plain ole lonely and wanted to be living in one of my "pre-momma days." I wanted to have my day pack and snowshoes strapped on and out hiking a mountain... with just me. I wanted no responsibilities, no nursing sessions to base my life around. I wanted my freedom. You know those moments when ya just don't want to be a momma and you want to be YOU? Well, that was my day until we started putting our Valentine's Day goodie bags together.
I'm not sure if it was the handfuls of these that I consumed or,
or the insane cuteness of these little candies,
but one thing was for sure, I was beginning to feel better.
And it wasn't until I started watching this little missy girl of mine, that I realized that I no longer wanted to be alone... I wanted to be right here with them. I wanted to watch them consume waaay too many treats and hoard them away in there "secret" bags. I wanted to be at my little baby's beckoning call for milk. I wanted to be...me and a momma! It's a struggle sometimes finding me in all the mix, but I know I'm there. Some days are harder than others, but thanks to my kiddo's and these cute little m&m's I was able to find...mommy&me. Sometimes it is the little things that make us realize who we really are. And someday I will have my day pack and snowshoes strapped on again. And hopefully I will have 3 little ones right behind me.
So how do you keep from loosing "me" in all the mix? Are you there in the mix or does motherhood change who you are? And...
isn't it ironic, how sometimes those little people that put you into that funky-funk in the first place, are the same little ones getting you out?!
Ok, enough deep thoughts from me for today. So whatcha making for Valentine's day?
I know what you mean...I have been in that funk for a week, A WEEK! I think alot of it has to do with the weather, cause today is GORGEOUS! We're pushing 50 degrees here in Nebraska and we will be running outside this afternoon to get the bad funk out of us! Hope you feel better!
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel. I have been there myself MANY days. But I do love and treasure my kids. I wouldn't trade them for the world.
ReplyDeleteI think motherhood does change who you are. Despite sometimes yearning for those free and easy days when it was just me, I look at my bubba and know I could never live without her now.
ReplyDeleteHow sweet!!! I love all the pink. What a nice little Valentine's Day gift to share.
ReplyDeleteLove to have you link up to my new link party, For the Kids Fridays!
http://sunscholars.blogspot.com
:)rachel
It's a sweet post that brings you through the mommy funk back around to joy--
ReplyDeleteI know motherhood changes us, but it's a growing process. We become bigger-hearted, more creative, more able to love and be loved(and being loved in ways we wouldn't necessarily have CHOSEN!).
I think mothering also allows us to "find ourselves" in a whole new way...my kids are older and as I look at those four individuals who are SO DIFFERENT from one another and SO LIKE ME and my husband, I marvel at the infinite creativity of God. One likes reading, like me. One loves art, like me. One likes minimaking, like me. . .and so on. I get to pursue my God-given interests WITH them, and what a blessing!
Those are adorable treat bags. Your kids are so beautiful. Enjoy the "little" days. They don't last long, all-told.
:)